Anyway.
I haven't been doing grande plies or any extensive jumps in the last two classes. It's helped my knee, but I know the pain is still there, I'm just not tapping into it.
It's beyond frustrating to know I can do all these things on my left side, and do them so well, but on my right I'm limited by this one thing. For seemingly no reason and with no real explanation.
Ugh.
But I was talking with Eloise after class on Monday. The two of us seem to be the most accident prone people on the face of the planet (obviously dramatic, but really) and we were talking about all the things we have to push through to continue to dance. We have all these opportunities to make excuses, but if we did, where would that leave us? We wouldn't dance. Hardly, at least. We wouldn't grow since we wouldn't be in classes enough. Sure, it may set me behind the other kids in the class my level, but as has been pointed out, look at how far I've come in under four years.
I went from being the derpy new girl who didn't know a jete from a pas de chat or how the heck to really do a rond de jambe, (Really. I had a friend tutor me in them it stressed me out so badly.)
(Thanks, Sarah.)
to this girl who is in the advanced class, the one called on for combinations because I am one of main ones to remember them. The girl that's watched for the counts or asked how it's done by the younger ones who are too afraid to ask the super advanced girls. I'm the one told by the teachers to take the advanced class when I didn't even consider it an option and the one who is holding her own in said class. (Minus pointe. We're getting there.)
And sure, it's frustrating to know I could be doing so much more if my knee weren't messing up. That I might even be able to handle advanced on pointe if I could plie enough on my right knee. But that's not where life is. And I can't do anything about it. I just have to handle it from here and be proactive and stay positive.
Look how far it's brought me already.
I managed to even do a pirouette on pointe in Monday's 5s class. It wasn't all that pretty, but it wasn't tense and it felt good. Feeling secure in a turn for the first time was incredible. So, I'm hopeful
Also, a spider or something bit my big toe, and it hurts to put pressure on the tip of my toe so we'll see what happens. Hah.
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